How You Know Me

[teleen_fiction]

Ganked from a couple of different places...

I want all of my online friends to comment about how you met me, but I want you to LIE.  JUST MAKE STUFF UP.  After you comment, post this to your journal so that I can do the same, :).

Comments

[thette.livejournal.com]

I wish I could tell you, but we were both drunk off our asses at the time. There was something about a pelican, a guide wire and a citation for indecent exposure somewhere along the line, and I woke up with sand in my undies. That's all I remember, sorry.

[masterde.livejournal.com]

It was that bondage club, right? The one on 34st and Industrial Ave. You know the one I'm talking about. All I heard was male screaming and so I went to investigate. You had some guy with needles coming out of his chest and rope tied tightly around his *cough*. Well, anyway, I think I watched for like 45 minutes. Just your never ending torture of this guy. I thought it was great and asked if you did private one-on-one sessions.

[excentric397.livejournal.com]

See, here's what happened. I decided to climb Mount Everest. I know, I know. Pipe dream. But I trained and I trained for months on end. I hired the finest Sherpas around and the best Guides, and bought state-of-the-art equipment. Luckily, I had recently won the lottery big time, so I could easily afford all of this. Anyway, I got myself to base camp, sat around for weeks to acclimatize myself, and started up.

The Sherpas were good. They were really good. We ran into a blizzard shortly before we reached the first camp. I think my brain may have gotten a touch of frostbite, because I can't remember what it's called. Anyway....the Sherpas got us to camp where we waited out the blizzard and tried not to freeze to death. Hot teas all around helped so much. Many, many hot teas. And beans. I hate beans.

On our way to the second camp, one of the Sherpas fell into a crevasse. Oh, goner. No, wait. The other Sherpas made a human chain down into the crevasse and pulled him out! It was a miracle of coordination and teamwork. Of course, this delayed us and by the time we finally reached camp, we were exhausted. But the Sherpas came through for us with more hot teas and beans. And then we slept. For 24 hours straight.

When we woke up, the tents were buried in snow. We had slept right through another blizzard. People were starting to rethink their desire to reach the top. A few discussed turning back, taking a couple of Sherpas to help them down. We all decided to wait until we had dug ourselves out and surveyed the situation in daylight.

Those who were really running out of what it takes for an endeavor this taxing decided to ho ahead and head down to first camp. The rest of us wanted to soldier on.

We finally reached third camp. This was it. No more stops. The next push will be to the top. We took a few days to acclimatize more and regain some of our energy. We ate well, and had lots more hot tea. Love those tea-making Sherpas. Yes. Yes I do.

Finally, we are ready. We start out at first light, with the hardest and most exciting part of the climb ahead of us. We were making pretty good time when one of the Sherpas slipped and plunged down the mountain, taking several members of the party with him. Thank goodness we were not all connected. There would have been a mass of bodies sliding down that mountain. Not fun. We took a while to get over the shock of it all and plowed ahead. Finally, finally, the peak was in site. We struggled up one slow agonizing step at a time until at last, there it was. I reached a point where I could see the goal at last. Wait. What??? Right there, on the tippy top of Everest, sat Teleen, having a cup of tea and some little cakes. And that's how we met.

[las.livejournal.com]

It was the afternoon that tanker truck full of high-fructose corn syrup jackknifed at the I-71 to 161 off-ramp and flooded the whole intersection. A bunch of people took refuge from the flood of sticky sweetness at Otani. And there, a diabetic man who'd just swallowed a mouthful of the stuff started hallucinating badly ... he got onstage and wouldn't stop wailing the lyrics to "Freebird", even though the karaoke track was playing "New York, New York". You helped me and Gary coax him down with a dynamite roll and you held his hand and sang "Whipping Post" with him while Gary gave him an insulin shot. Our ears and his life were saved that day.

[teleens-journal.livejournal.com]

You win.

[teleens-journal.livejournal.com]

*giggling*

[teleens-journal.livejournal.com]

Only with those I know well.... Or who beg prettily enough, ;).

[teleens-journal.livejournal.com]

At least all you had was sand - I had a friggin' jellyfish in there!