I'd be cautious of making such a sweeping generalization. I consider myself fortunate in that each of the men and women I've been with has wanted to "Take Care" of me to some extent, (though I likely attract that type of partner because my own personality is more submissive) while at the same time RESPECTING me and not making me into a "child" or themselves into a "father/mother" figure as opposed to a romantic partner.
I think that ANYONE in a relationship should have SOME desire to take care of the other. The woman should want to do for the man and the man should want to do for the woman. (I'm speaking of heterosexual relationships here, because we are discussing men/women - not because I see heterosexual relationships as the only 'norm'.)
True, I don't think anyone would want a partner that is totally incapable of caring for themselves, but there are plenty of men who take pride in caring for and providing for their wives and children. My Sig Other is one of them.
Just as I take that same pride in "taking care" of both him and my son. I may not bring in as much money (about a quarter of his income, because I'm on disability due to chronic and debilitating illness), but my contributions come in other, just as meaningful, ways.
I am a naturally more submissive person, and my partners of BOTH genders are usually more dominant than I am - by my own choice. Being more comfortable in a submissive role does NOT however mean that I would ever allow myself to be disrespected or abused by a partner.
There are men who prefer more submissive personalities in their female counterparts; but the same can be said of women.
The fetish community is full of men who want to "take care" of women , and 'loving dominant' and 'guide/teacher/caregiver' are popular a sub-genres of "Dominant"; those who have no wish to humiliate or debase or cause pain, but still enjoy being the one 'in charge'. Those roles are not NECESSARILY gender specific though. That's not a man/woman thing... It's a HUMAN thing.
Some type-A women prefer men who will allow them to take charge more often, as well; and there are just as many men who prefer that type of woman!
It's a very individual thing, and not really gender-related, imho.
Relationships work when both parties are happy with the arrangement and gender isn't so much a concern as the two (or, if you're poly, more) personalities complimenting each other.
I AGREE with you that women should, OF COURSE, have all the same opportunities and rights as men, and that they should NOT have to apologize for DEMANDING EQUALITY... I'm only saying that it would be nice if we didn't lose some choices while gaining others.
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And to your last point :)
Date: 2010-10-03 04:46 pm (UTC)Most men do not want to "take care" of a woman."
I'd be cautious of making such a sweeping generalization. I consider myself fortunate in that each of the men and women I've been with has wanted to "Take Care" of me to some extent, (though I likely attract that type of partner because my own personality is more submissive) while at the same time RESPECTING me and not making me into a "child" or themselves into a "father/mother" figure as opposed to a romantic partner.
I think that ANYONE in a relationship should have SOME desire to take care of the other. The woman should want to do for the man and the man should want to do for the woman. (I'm speaking of heterosexual relationships here, because we are discussing men/women - not because I see heterosexual relationships as the only 'norm'.)
True, I don't think anyone would want a partner that is totally incapable of caring for themselves, but there are plenty of men who take pride in caring for and providing for their wives and children. My Sig Other is one of them.
Just as I take that same pride in "taking care" of both him and my son. I may not bring in as much money (about a quarter of his income, because I'm on disability due to chronic and debilitating illness), but my contributions come in other, just as meaningful, ways.
I am a naturally more submissive person, and my partners of BOTH genders are usually more dominant than I am - by my own choice. Being more comfortable in a submissive role does NOT however mean that I would ever allow myself to be disrespected or abused by a partner.
There are men who prefer more submissive personalities in their female counterparts; but the same can be said of women.
The fetish community is full of men who want to "take care" of women , and 'loving dominant' and 'guide/teacher/caregiver' are popular a sub-genres of "Dominant"; those who have no wish to humiliate or debase or cause pain, but still enjoy being the one 'in charge'. Those roles are not NECESSARILY gender specific though. That's not a man/woman thing... It's a HUMAN thing.
Some type-A women prefer men who will allow them to take charge more often, as well; and there are just as many men who prefer that type of woman!
It's a very individual thing, and not really gender-related, imho.
Relationships work when both parties are happy with the arrangement and gender isn't so much a concern as the two (or, if you're poly, more) personalities complimenting each other.
I AGREE with you that women should, OF COURSE, have all the same opportunities and rights as men, and that they should NOT have to apologize for DEMANDING EQUALITY... I'm only saying that it would be nice if we didn't lose some choices while gaining others.