First off, I'd like to say how much I'm enjoying our conversation. :)
I appreciate intelligent conversation, debate, etc., with those who are intelligent, well-informed, articulate and mature. <3
Sadly, too often the label of "feminist" is taken on by women like the one I just wrote up an entry (http://ravynskye.livejournal.com/62891.html?format=light) about, and that has become a more prevalent perception of feminism recently... There has been backlash from both men and women because of those man-bashers who have hijacked the feminist lable and used 'feminism' to justify their vilification, bashing and stereotyping of men.
Some men are assholes. I know this first hand. I still have trust issues with men, and for a long time I did not see men as CAPABLE OF 'LOVE' in the same way that women are. I truly believed that any 'love' they were showing or expressing was only shown because they had the ulterior motive of wanting sex.
Luckily, over time, and therapy, and meeting men who gained my trust and respect, I overcame those beliefs... But I certainly was no fan of the male gender for many of my formative years.
The economy since the 1930's had a pretty stable cost-of-living raise each year until it exploded in the 1970's and even financial analysts attributed that to women working outside the home more than ever before. That is also why it stabalized relatively quickly and went back to about 3% a year after 1987.
Despite this, I certainly wasn't implying women should have stayed home if they wanted to work. I apologize if that wasn't made clear. What I was trying to say was that women should never have been made to feel like staying home was a BETRAYAL to their gender or a form of slavery, or 'prostitution'. (The argument being that a single income relationship where one party financially supports the other is the same as trading sex for money.)
*I* was, just THREE MONTHS AGO, wanked for being "financially dependent" on my Sig Other. I RESENT THAT. I RESENT that I should have to JUSTIFY my CHOICE (to other women, no less) to stay at home and raise my child.
Just as you are totally correct when you say that woman should NOT have justify wanting her own money, or wanting to work, or feel bad for demanding equal pay as a man in the same position, *I* (and women like me) should NOT have to justify being comfortable allowing my Sig Other to handle the bills while I raise (and home school) my child.
I would NEVER attack a working mother for having a job and not staying home... So why can working mothers attack ME and try to make ME feel ashamed for ?not putting my TWO COLLEGE DEGREES to good use"?
AREN'T WE ALL ON THE SAME SIDE?
I believe in independance for women, and women having the tools to make that a reality. I am educated. I have two college degrees. I am fluent in two languages and conversational in four. I could go back to work tomorrow if I so choose, because there is ALWAYS a nursing shortage.
But yet, I was still 'shamed' by others because I CHOOSE to be dependent financially for the time being?
Re: The second 'stay-at-home-mom' point
I appreciate intelligent conversation, debate, etc., with those who are intelligent, well-informed, articulate and mature. <3
Sadly, too often the label of "feminist" is taken on by women like the one I just wrote up an entry (http://ravynskye.livejournal.com/62891.html?format=light) about, and that has become a more prevalent perception of feminism recently... There has been backlash from both men and women because of those man-bashers who have hijacked the feminist lable and used 'feminism' to justify their vilification, bashing and stereotyping of men.
Some men are assholes. I know this first hand. I still have trust issues with men, and for a long time I did not see men as CAPABLE OF 'LOVE' in the same way that women are. I truly believed that any 'love' they were showing or expressing was only shown because they had the ulterior motive of wanting sex.
Luckily, over time, and therapy, and meeting men who gained my trust and respect, I overcame those beliefs... But I certainly was no fan of the male gender for many of my formative years.
The economy since the 1930's had a pretty stable cost-of-living raise each year until it exploded in the 1970's and even financial analysts attributed that to women working outside the home more than ever before. That is also why it stabalized relatively quickly and went back to about 3% a year after 1987.
Despite this, I certainly wasn't implying women should have stayed home if they wanted to work. I apologize if that wasn't made clear. What I was trying to say was that women should never have been made to feel like staying home was a BETRAYAL to their gender or a form of slavery, or 'prostitution'. (The argument being that a single income relationship where one party financially supports the other is the same as trading sex for money.)
*I* was, just THREE MONTHS AGO, wanked for being "financially dependent" on my Sig Other. I RESENT THAT. I RESENT that I should have to JUSTIFY my CHOICE (to other women, no less) to stay at home and raise my child.
Just as you are totally correct when you say that woman should NOT have justify wanting her own money, or wanting to work, or feel bad for demanding equal pay as a man in the same position, *I* (and women like me) should NOT have to justify being comfortable allowing my Sig Other to handle the bills while I raise (and home school) my child.
I would NEVER attack a working mother for having a job and not staying home... So why can working mothers attack ME and try to make ME feel ashamed for ?not putting my TWO COLLEGE DEGREES to good use"?
AREN'T WE ALL ON THE SAME SIDE?
I believe in independance for women, and women having the tools to make that a reality. I am educated. I have two college degrees. I am fluent in two languages and conversational in four. I could go back to work tomorrow if I so choose, because there is ALWAYS a nursing shortage.
But yet, I was still 'shamed' by others because I CHOOSE to be dependent financially for the time being?