Ugh, Grimm

Nov. 30th, 2014 07:05 pm

TW:  RAPE

I've been pissed off about this for months, to the point where I refused to watch the first five episodes of the new season until just last week.  Sadly, they handled said episodes nearly as badly as I expected them to.

Spoilers.

Read more... )

This is your trigger warning.

Scroll fast if you need to because I'm not cutting this.

Before this case came about, I'd heard of Steubenville from a lovely older couple (the Enditches from Steubenville, which is how I remember) on a bus tour I took roughly twenty-two years ago.

I didn't know about the football program there or how it was basically the only thing that held the town together.  However, when I heard it, it didn't surprise me because of how utterly beyond the pale OSU fans are.  They riot sometimes when they WIN, :/.

For those of you who are either not in the U.S. or who have been living under a large boulder for the last few months, a young woman of sixteen got drunk at a party last August and was dragged, semi-conscious and unconscious to several locations, where she was sexually assaulted multiple times.  She didn't know she'd been attacked until the next day, when she discovered multiple text posts, pictures, and videos about/of the assaults had been posted online.

Sunday, two football players, Trent Mays and Ma'lik Richmond, were convicted of "digitally penetrating" her. There were at least two dozen other witnesses/possible assailants, but these two were (in my opinion) the sacrificial lambs.  I wonder how good they were on the team?  I wonder how many more players/bystanders actually assaulted this young woman?  These two young men were convicted in juvenile court despite their ages (seventeen and sixteen, which in a lot of cases would have them tried as adults), which means that once they're over twenty-one, their records could be swept clean.  Yes, they have to register as "juvenile sex offenders" and yes, their pictures have been plastered all over the media, (we'll be talking more about the media in a moment), which will hopefully help to save future victims, but they still won't have ADULT criminal records.  This still won't necessarily ruin their lives forever in the same way it's affected the life of their victim, who has been shamed in court and received death threats from two other young women via social media sites.  Ohio's Attorney General is charging those who made the latest threats, but where are the charges against all of those who watched this young women be raped?  Not only that, but made videos in which they were laughing about her being raped.

To be clear, I think that this young woman can overcome this, but she might not.  She might not be able to come back from what they did to her.  Her life might spiral out of control because of the control that was stolen from her that night.  She's a survivor either way, but whether this rules her life forever or she's able to put it behind her, the fault still lies with those who, according to the prosecution, "treated her like a toy."

Where is the outrage?  Oh, that's right.  It's being directed towards the RAPISTS, in that media outlets like CNN think it's a shame that their lives were ruined by all of this. (Here's a petition you can sign to tell them what you think of their coverage of this issue.)  And the fucking Onion predicted all of this two years ago.

So what am I taking away from all of this?  I'm not a person once I get drunk.  Hell, I'm not a person if I'm out after dark alone or forget to lock my door or to set my alarm or am not careful enough with my surroundings or wear pants that are "too tight," a skirt that is "too short," or a burqa that shows "too much ankle."  You see where I'm going with this, right?

We teach men that women are "asking for it."  We teach them that they aren't responsible for their actions and that their "innocent lives" could be ruined by "giving in" to a girl who was too drunk to say no.  We shame rape victims so much that someone made a video called, "Shit Everyone Says To Rape Victims," and I'd heard them all before.

Our society doesn't teach men not to rape. Look at what happened to the woman who dared to suggest that we do so on Fox News - she was vilified and got both rape and death threats. Bullying is a part of it - men are bullied by their peers into going along with behavior that makes them seem "manly" to said peers. Even now, we're telling them to "man up," as though being a man is automatically strong and capable.


However, young men are also bullied by their fathers who bullied them, "Don't be a [misogynistic slur]" if they dare to express their emotions. They are bullied by a society that tells them that they aren't "real men" unless they attract as many women as possible, by any means possible. This is not peer-on-peer bullying. This is bullying at every level, from every angle, every day from the moment these young men are born.


If this is not 100% clear - I'm not excusing their actions, but until the rape culture stops telling women how they can avoid rape instead of telling men not to rape, cases like this will continue to happen.  People are starting to think this way (in Vancouver, an ad campaign entitled "Don't Be That Guy" has helped to reduce sexual assaults there by 10%), but the process is entirely too slow.   Also, the myth of the stranger attack needs to go away. Most women are raped by men they know. The Steubenville survivor even testified that she "thought she could trust" one of her rapists and didn't realize that she couldn't until she saw all of the social media about her attack the next day.

Can you imagine that?  Finding out you were raped (and that multiple bystanders, many of whom were your classmates, stood around ENJOYING your rape as though it was entertainment) via fucking Facebook and Twitter?  Can you imagine having two supposed friends of yours call you a liar and end your friendship because they wanted you to leave the party and you didn't do so, ergo what happened to you was your fault?

I've spoken about this before, but seeing what this sixteen-year-old woman is having to go through, with 18,000 townspeople she's known all her life and thousands more strangers online all acting as though this situation came about because she was drunk and not because those young men are fucking rapists, is making me sick on a level I can't begin to express.

She deserves better.  She deserves to be believed, to be supported, to be cared for, and, above all, to be told it was NOT HER FAULT!  But we don't do that in this country, or apparently any other, if Steig Larson and recent reports out of India are accurate, which I'm certain they are.  And those are only two examples - if anyone knows of a country/culture where rape is considered SOLELY the fault of the rapist, I would certainly love to hear about it, as I could use some good news on this front today.

The worst part - everything I've linked here is the barest tip of an iceberg so huge it could sink a million Titanics.  I could find dozens more links, all telling me that in the eyes of the world, my bodily autonomy is subject to the whims of others.

Society doesn't see me as a person.  I'm going to fight to change that.


ETA: Henry Rollins' commentary is rather similar to mine.
Sadly, I can't link to it here because it has the person's real name attached, but there's a viral image on Facebook that is a screencap of the following status:

I caught my son walking home with the gay kid from across the street.  My hand and his butt are going to be sore for the rest of the night.

A friend re-posted the image with the following caption:

Complete parenting fail.  The best way to teach your children hate and bigotry is to violently abuse them.

As her name was on it (she has an uncommon name and the pictures matched), I sent her the following message with the picture attached:

I wanted you to know that your incredibly awful parenting has gone viral. Congratulations on teaching your son hate, bigotry, and fear through abuse. You are disgusting and should be ashamed of yourself.

She'll probably be able to get the image pulled if she reports it to Facebook, but for now I'm happy to see her publicly shamed for being an intolerant child abuser.  There's also a fan page that's been set up to bash her with the tag line, "Proud homophobe and child abuser."

If there's anyone out there thinking that I (or anyone else) shouldn't sink to her level by shaming her, bothering her with messages, or any other such rot, allow me to remind you that she's the one who hit her child because he walked home with a child who may or may not be gay.  If you're on her side in any way, shape, or form, your comments aren't welcome here.
...I also used to smoke pot to get high.  I don't do either anymore for reasons that are none of your business.  But then, it's not really your business that I did either in the first place.

What's my point here?  I'm just sick and tired of seeing posts floating around that say, "What about all of those women who have horrible periods?  Or bad acne?  Or ovarian cysts?  Are they whores and sluts too?"  Or with marijuana it's, "What about cancer patients?  Or people with glaucoma?"

Who gives a fuck WHY someone is taking medication?  Why does it need to be justified at all?

I took birth control because wanted to fuck and I didn't want to have an unplanned pregnancy.  I used it in addition to other methods because I REALLY didn't want an unplanned pregnancy.  

And again, I smoked weed because I liked the feeling more than I enjoyed the feeling of alcohol.  

But my feelings on these subjects don't count.  Never mind that it's MY body and I wasn't hurting anyone, my reasons for using these drugs aren't as socially acceptable, so I get to be shamed by even those who are ostensibly on "my side" for doing things that are no one's business but mine.  And yes, I do see it as shaming when someone says, "Well, what about those people with legitimate medical conditions who use these drugs?" because it's still playing into the culture that says that doing what one wants with one's own body is not okay unless there's a reason other than pleasure for doing it.

Well, fuck all of you who use this justification.  I liked fucking and being high.  I still like fucking, but I chose to stop using hormonal birth control. 

Because it's my fucking body.  Not yours.  And you don't get to have an opinion about what I do with my body so long as I'm not causing direct harm to you PERSONALLY. 

Oh, and before anyone says something about the Pill being legal and marijuana not being so, in states where the "personhood" bills are being passed, the type of hormonal birth control I was on would become illegal, so there you are.  The only drug that should be illegal is meth because it can endanger a neighborhood simply by making it.  Everything else should be legal and regulated.  Period.
So Keith Olbermann and I definitely don't agree on everything.  I've actually written him e-mails in the past chastising him for equating a female political figure to a prostitute and for contributing to the rape culture.

Tonight, though, may be where Keith and I part ways.  In his "Worst Persons" segment for December 13, 2011, Keith has the "Runner Up" as Joe Amendola, Jerry Sandusky's lawyer, who invited people to dial 1-800-REALITY if they believed the witness statements.

Yeah, someone (deadspin.com) called 1-800-REALITY and it's a gay men's sex hotline. 

Cut for homosexuality & references to pedophilia in the same sentence, :(. )

I feel utterly sick about this.  Yeah, I already knew that Keith Olbermann wasn't perfect, but -  And the "but" is what's killing me.  I've let a lot of his behavior slide because most of the time, what he has to say is worth hearing.  However, to be absolutely fair, I usually watch his show on fast-forward, just watching headlines and skipping most of the pundits, so I may have missed a lot more fail in the past.  It's going to take him owning up to this egregious error for him to regain my respect after this.  I'll also be interested to see if anyone else comments about his homophobic choice of words.

What makes this even more horrible is that I used to think that his Special Comment on Prop 8 was one of the best things I'd ever heard a straight ally say. 
Originally posted by [livejournal.com profile] heeroluva at Livejournal to do away with subject line in comments
FYI I did not translate this (found it on an anon comm), but I ran the original through Google translate and it's correct.

[livejournal.com profile] igrick, dude in charge of lj design, has posted the following today:

New LJ. Step one: comments.

Folks, as the first step of a major design change me and Tyoma (lj user tema) were talking about we've rolled out the new comments system onto the beta-testing servers. I wanted to say "rolled out the new design" but it's really is a completely new system, not a simple design change. It's only available to beta-users for now (you can become one by joining the[livejournal.com profile] lj_ru_beta community and enabling beta-mode here) and to journals that have default commenting design enabled (like mine does).

Better see once than read this text a hundred times, but I'm going to talk about my impressions and major changes anyway.

- new comments can be added without page reload;
- comments could be posted by pressing ctrl+enter shortcut - this is genius;
- comments no longer have Subject field and this is non-negotiable;
- mass comment actions are made simpler: you only need to select one comment and you'll see the actions panel (we'll add more options later);
- marking new comments option - the juiciest part for people who get many of them. It's very simple: adds "new" mark to comments that were added since you've last visited the page. I've got a new habit because of it: I open the comments page, mark the first comment, select "mark all" and "collapse all" and then scroll down looking for new comments which I then expand and reply to. That means that all new comments get replies in one go without page being refreshed. Then I refresh the page and repeat the process. It's much more useful for me than email because I get a lot of comments.


Big pic (in Russian) under cut, but it gives the basic idea )

- Because of the new method of selecting userpics I've started using them more.
- It's much easier to add a link, a picture or a video into a comment (we'll add selecting/adding to and from the ScrapBook).
- All actions are now animated and that looks much nicer.

And many other nice things. Anyway, if you're interested - try out the beta-mode, discuss, criticize, suggest.


My thoughts:
So I'm definitely not thrilled with this. The whole removal of subject lines will totally mess up kink/comment memes/comms. I kind of foresee a mass migration to Dreamwidth.

Going through the comments people don't seem happy. In one reply [livejournal.com profile] igrick says that less than 1% of commenters use the subject line, the person resorts by asking for backing for that statistic and what about the communities that rely heavily on the use of subjects, and then igrick says I already gave you the statistic... Also is seems like this will affect ALL PREVIOUS COMMENTS not just new ones. Taking a moment to consider email notifications, if you're following a post with a lot of comments that would have previously been separated by subject, there will now be no way to differentiate them in emails because of the lack of a subject line.

It seems like the site is being pushed to be like facebook. If I wanted to use facebook I'd be there... seeing as this isn't facebook I don't want it to work like it. Comments also say that with this system the page loads slower than refreshing upon the addition of a comment (as if LJ wasn't slow enough already). The addition of animations and transitions will not make this browser friendly and will significantly hinder people with slower computers... As someone that normally has dozens of LJ tabs open at a time and a browser that uses too much memory as it is, this does not seem like a good thing.

Oh look and we have some English comments popping up that show how much igrick doesn't care:
Commenter: It is absolutely unacceptable to remove subject lines. You can say goodbye to fandom if you implement that.
igrick: Is it just a copy-past from some other place, or your thoughts?

Commenter: Why are subject lines being removed? Please explain.
igrick: Just because of 99% of comments have no subject and displayed as "no subject" in threads. It is not make sense to have a subject for comment.

Do the 99% that don't use subjects really care? Does it offend them in some way? Does it inconvenience them to see it? So the 1% don't matter? The hundreds of communities that have hundreds of thousands of posts where subject lines are immensely important don't matter? Yes, this is most likely to effect fandom communities, but if a mass exodus of fandom communities happens, the individuals are likely to follow. If this is implemented (without the option to opt out) it will not be a good thing for LJ's fannish userbase.

So about 18 months ago, I defended someone who was using a "Grammar Nazi" icon.  It was a shitty thing to do, I was rightly called out for it and since then I've become more aware of the word and have started calling people out when I see them using it to mean anything other than "people who support or supported Hitler". 

So now, 18 months later, someone's passing around a spelling meme on Facebook and captioned it, "For all you Grammar Nazis Out There".  I said something to the originator of the meme.  Was argued with.  Twice.  And so posted the following as my status:

Things that are Nazis: People who support or supported Hitler and his ideology.
Things that are not Nazis: Everyone else.
Please do not confuse one with the other. Thank you.
The following conversation ensued:

Cut for length and epic stupidity. )ETA: Random Commenter #2 )Cut for length and epic stupidity. )


ETA 2: The Jackass' response and more conversation. )
ETA 3: Yet another response from the jackass and my response. )ETA 4: Deep. Hurting. Yep, he responded again and derailed the conversation so far off the original point that I have no clue how to get it back on track. I tried, though. )
ETA 5: Jackass: I understand that you're offended by me using the term "IT Nazi". Well, I am not going to change it. )



*************************************************

Here's the thing, 18 months ago, I was that jackass.

Cut for length.  )
Warning: Possible triggers for slurs in both the comments and the post.  Also, general asshattery. 
[livejournal.com profile] sparkindarkness just posted an entry regarding the fetishization of gay men, especially that of a few well-known actors who've come out recently.  He also made me aware of this disgusting "You Know You're Addicted To Slash" meme, upon which I will now comment:

Cut for length and homophobia. )

Some of you might think I'm being hypocritical here because I both read and write slash (and I'll admit, the majority of what I read online is slash). 

However.

When I write it, I try to treat the characters with respect, not as poseable fuck dolls.  And when I'm reading it, I stay away from authors who write nothing but stereotypes.  It's a fine line, perhaps, which is why I'm trying to stay on the correct side of it and not forget that I'm reading about people.  Fictional people, yes, but still - characterization is important.  Treating the subject matter with respect is important.  More than important - respect for what one is reading and writing is just basic human decency.

One final word on fetishization.  I'm a bisexual woman.  Men are very "accepting" of me and my sexuality.  Because they think it's "hot".  They could care less about me or any woman I might have sex with as people - all they care about is being allowed to watch.  

If you care about the rights of BGLTQP people even when they aren't providing you with entertainment, you're someone I'd like to know and be around.  However, if you only think of us in terms of the entertainment we can provide to you - fuck off.   

On The ERA

Oct. 1st, 2011 06:12 pm
I've been hearing about the Equal Rights Amendment for most of my life.  My dad was (and I assume, is, though the subject hasn't come up recently) very anti-ERA (big shock to all of you, I know).  From the semi-coherent ramblings he gave me on the subject, I assumed it was a plot to turn women into men (or something equally stupid).  I'd never actually read the text of it until last week and I have to say, it utterly stunned me:

bulletSection 1. Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex.
bulletSection 2. The Congress shall have the power to enforce, by appropriate legislation, the provisions of this article.
bulletSection 3. This amendment shall take effect two years after the date of ratification.
That's it.

Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex. 

It's mind-boggling, stunning, sickening - I really can't put into words how horrified I am that this has been impossible to pass.  

Cut for length and possible triggers for everything associated with anti-feminist thought. )

Why is all of this so difficult?

Why can't I just be a person? 
This is the only trigger warning you're getting, because I absolutely REFUSE to cut this.  Scroll fast if you need to.  

Today is the two-year anniversary of his murder and I had no plans to blog about it beyond re-posting this tribute on Facebook.

All of that changed when I went to Hometown Buffet today and saw what shall furthermore be referred to as an "Abortion Bus."  It could have been a converted camper (it had one of those 'over-the-cab' camper-like attachments, but it was painted blood red and so covered in anti-abortion propaganda and PICTURES OF DEAD FETUSES that it was hard to tell for sure).

I went in and complained to the manager of the restaurant, that since it was on private property they shouldn't allow it there.  The manager tried to say it was a "First Amendment" thing and that he didn't want to get involved.  I only wish I hadn't already paid for our food, but we made the decision there and then - we'll never eat there if we see that bus in their parking lot.  I also wrote to Old Country Buffet, telling them exactly how I feel about their managers dismissal of allowing such horrific images to be displayed RIGHT IN FRONT OF A RESTAURANT where people are trying to eat.  I'm also seriously considering NEVER stepping foot in there again, given that their attitude and considering we've been eating there VERY often lately and have probably eaten there an average of once per month for the last fifteen years, that's pretty significant.

It's very, VERY lucky that I didn't know to whom the bus belonged, that I had no clue who they were in the restaurant, because I likely would have confronted them for being pro-slavery assholes.  And yes, I just said fucking SLAVERY.  Forcing a woman to have a baby she doesn't want sounds a lot like turning her into a broodmare and to me, that goes beyond a basic violation of human rights and says 'slavery' to me. 

I have to say, seeing that made me more Pro-Choice than ever, made me even flippantly remark that I'd like to go out and get an abortion just for spite.  Keep in mind, I WANT to have a baby, but with asshats like this trying to FORCE me into it, it makes me less than thrilled about the prospect of ever being pregnant, especially being high-risk and older, which leads to a greater chance that I would need the services of someone like Dr. Tiller.  

If you're reading this and are anti-choice in any way, shape, or form, go fuck yourself.  You can be pro-woman, in the sense that you are in favor of helping pregnant women have more options than just abortion, but if you are in ANY WAY in favor of overturning Roe Vs Wade or restricting a woman's freedom to choose what she may do with HER BODY, stay the fuck away from me and my spaces.   

You are not welcome here. 
God Vs. $20 

When I first saw the post about this in [livejournal.com profile] antitheism, I couldn't bring myself to watch the video past the first minute, but then  [livejournal.com profile] rpeate made this comment and I had to watch it to see if I could find evidence to call bullshit on this sentence in particular:

No, if they had scribbled out the word "God", Mike would likely have said, "Their faith is secure," and not posted the video.

I figured that since I was going to have to watch it, I'd also transcribe it.  This was partly so that I could have ammunition to pick it apart and partly so that I could distance myself from what I was seeing.  Even so, there were times when I literally broke down crying while watching this. 

However, my tears were rewarded as sure enough, as I was transcribing, I found the proof that [livejournal.com profile] rpeate claim that Mike wouldn't have posted the video was complete and utter bullshit.

Towards the end, Mike says, "And don’t let it be said that I’m unreasonable.  We finally came to an agreement, but in hindsight it just looks ridiculous and childish.  I mean, they’re still selling out. They’re still taking the thirty pieces of silver."

So yeah, I'm calling bullshit over there. 

For those who are interested, here's the transcript. Never having done one before, I hope you find it legible.  )
ETA: I went back through the video and cleaned up a few parts.  It's still not word-for-word, but it's a lot closer than it was.  I also added a couple of additional sporks.

ETA 2: Mike came over to the original post in [livejournal.com profile] antitheism to play.  Here's his comment thread.

ETA 3: This got linked on unfunnybusiness on journalfen for anyone who wants to see more discussion.

87%

Feb. 22nd, 2011 02:25 am
87% of the counties in the United Fucking States of America lack an abortion provider.

87%

I just...

I give up.

Obviously, the religious extremists in this country have won and I should just accept my fate as a broodmare.

Neigh.

Oh, and I happen to live in one of the 13% of counties that actually has an abortion provider.  That doesn't make me feel anything but numb.

87%

Fuck me sideways.

Ohio “Heartbeat” bill could ban abortion just 18 days after conception

Quick show of hands, all you moms out there:

How many of you knew you were pregnant EIGHTEEN FUCKING DAYS after conception?

This is it.  I'm done.  From now on my stance on abortion is as follows:

My body, my choice.  Your body, your choice.  I don't care what you do with your body so long as you don't infringe on my body while you're doing it.  Every woman should have access to an abortion at any point during her pregnancy for any reason she chooses to have it.  PERIOD.  What is growing inside of her isn't alive until it takes a breath outside her body.  Until then, it is a fucking parasite and has ZERO rights that infringe upon the woman who is carrying it.   

No more fucking arguments about when a life becomes a life, because it leads to shit like this.  A life becomes a life when the woman carrying it CHOOSES to bring it into the world and not one moment before.  PERIOD. 

It only becomes a life when it is breathing outside of the woman.  NOT when it could theoretically take a breath.  When it is actually fucking BREATHING

If you don't like my definition of life, fuck off.  Seriously.  Fuck off.  Either I have the right to say what is done with my body AND WHEN or I don't.  If I do, I'm a human being.  If I don't, I'm a broodmare whose only purpose is propagation of the species.  If I don't, I should never be heard from and stay in my house, pumping out child after child with no other thought or reason to exist. 

The moment someone says, "Abortion should ONLY be allowed IF," it turns every woman into a beggar for basic human dignity and respect.  It makes female rights contingent upon what someone else feels is moral.  It takes my body and turns it into a vessel for someone else to fill with whatever they fuck they feel like putting in there.  

Either I'm a person or I'm an incubator.

Try and make me into an incubator.  I fucking dare you. 

Try. 
Originally posted by [livejournal.com profile] ladyqkat at Dear GOP - the collective you are an Idiot
(Post originally seen in this post by [livejournal.com profile] ramblin_phyl. I have been notified that it was originally posted by [livejournal.com profile] suricattus in her journal post. The story and words are hers, but I do believe that it needs to go viral and that as many people as possible need to get their stories out there. Only by making a noise about this can we make a change in our society.)  Re-posted from [livejournal.com profile] kadymae.

There is a move afoot in the nation -driven by the GOP - to repeal the new health care laws, to protect corporate interests, to defend against fear-mongering (and stupid) cries of "socialism!", and to ensure that people are forced to choose between keeping a roof over their heads or getting necessary health care.

This movement is killing people.

Think I'm overstating the fact?

Ask the friends and family of writer/reviewer Melissa Mia Hall, who died of a heart attack last week because she was so terrified of medical bills, she didn't go see a doctor who could have saved her life.

From another writer friend: One person. Not the only one. That could have been me. Yeah, I have access to insurance -- I live in New York City, which is freelancer-friendly, and have access to freelancer advocacy groups. Through them, I can pay over $400/month ($5,760/year) as a single, healthy woman, so that if I go to the hospital I'm not driven to bankruptcy. But a doctor's appointment - a routine physical - can still cost me several hundred dollars each visit. So unless something's terribly wrong? I won't go.

My husband worked for the government for 30 years. We have government employee (retired) insurance. It is the only thing of value he took away from that job. His pension is pitiful. He still works part time. My writing income has diminished drastically. Our combined income is now less than what it was before T retired fifteen years ago. Inflation has diminished it further. In the last 30 days I have racked up over $8000 in medical bills for tests and the beginning of treatment. Our co-pay is 20% after the deductible. And there is more to come. Our savings are already gone. I have the gold standard of insurance and I still can't pay all the medical bills.

Another friend lost her insurance when her husband lost his job. She couldn't afford medication and ended up bed ridden for three months at the end of over a year of no job and therefore no insurance until he found work again.

It's our responsibility. All of us, together. As a nation.

EtA: Nobody is trying to put insurance companies out of business. They will always be able to offer a better plan for a premium. We simply want to ensure that every citizen - from infant to senior citizen - doesn't have to choose between medical care, and keeping a roof over their heads, or having enough to eat.

We're trying to get this to go viral. Pass it along.




I'm going to post my story as the first comment to this post if anyone would like to read it. If anyone wants to tell their story, please tell it on your own journal and post a link in the comments. Maybe, just maybe, TPTB will listen to the slaves peons who clean their toilets before they have to clean their own.

Wyatt Cenac finds an historic black town in Mississippi where birds are revered more than people.



This story will make you rage and throw things.  Seriously.
Inspired by more than one comment on the post that this post links to, I'm finally going to weigh in on the whole anti-PC, thought-police, this-word-has-another-meaning-and-no-one-can-own-a-word, I-don't have-to-change-simply-because-you're-offended school of thought.

I'm going to begin by saying that I'm guilty of using pretty much every word that is at issue at one point or another, some as recently as last year, so I'm not saying that I'm not in a glass house here. 

However.

For those who are against changing their language to remove certain words from their vocabularies because another person is offended by it, I ask the following question:

Who does it hurt? 

Seriously, who does it hurt to make the effort not to use words that others have found offensive?  I know that it's an effort to do so, so I guess someone could argue that it's hurting them by virtue of the fact that changing one's vocabulary and deleting certain words is hella difficult...  Well, I have to say that it's more difficult in the offline world, but online?  It's as easy as being careful of what one types.  I realize that for some, who type as quickly as they think, that could be a challenge, but seriously?  Who does it hurt?  Why is it such a big deal to just not be an asshat when someone asks you to do so?

Cut for possible triggers and an incomplete list of incredibly offensive slurs that everyone should know not to use. Ever.  )And because I've been educating myself a bunch lately, here are a bunch of links that all say all of this a lot better than I just did.

101 Primer

[livejournal.com profile] sparkindarkness' entire journal.

Read all of that and then come back to discuss, if you wish, :).

ETA: Proof that not being an asshat is an ongoing battle: Weak is ableist.  Thank you to [livejournal.com profile] 51stcenturyfox  for letting me know, :).

ETA 2: My comment thread on the post that started all of this is here

ETA 3: Drama communities are probably not the best place to start, lol, but if it were not for them I never would have found most of this stuff out, which is why I mentioned them.  The best place to start is with the 101 Primer and go from there, :).

This post has now been edited because my essential message was being lost and I was doing more harm than good by defending my position on one phrase.  Most of the comments regarding that phrase have now been screened.  I'm not a PoC, so my feelings on that phrase don't matter whatsoever and continuing to argue about it only detracts from the essential point of what I was trying to say. 

I apologize for the drama.

For the record I am US-born, white, queer though I easily pass for both female and straight, and able-bodied.  I have no personal experience with physical, racial or ethnic discrimination and I apologize for speaking for those groups as if I were personally invested in those particular slurs not being used.

The areas in which I have personal experience and/or a personal investment include: feminism/sexim, sex work, body image/food, sexual freedom, BGLTQP rights/homophobia, bullying, child abuse, the US foster care system, the US health care system, PTSD, anxiety, depression and mental health.  

Back-Alley Abortions in 2011: How Anti-Choice Zealots Force Women to Go to Dangerous Clinics Like Dr. Kermit Gosnell's

I've spoken about reproductive rights before, but always with the understanding that some people out there are Pro-Life.  I haven't been respectful of that position, but I've at least tried not to judge it too hard.

To be clear, my definition of Pro-Life is NOT someone who is against abortion, but against women having the freedom to CHOOSE an abortion.

Everyone is against abortion. EVERYONE. )
This is my line in the sand, friends' list.  I don't mind if you believe that life begins at conception (even though I disagree) and work to give women other options.  I'm 100% in favor of women having the freedom to HAVE THE BABY if that's what they wish to do - reproduction should never be a financial concern, even though it always is, :(.  The issue here is about giving women the freedom to be able to choose what's right for them and what they will be able to live with. 

However, if you identify as Pro-Life (rather than Pro-Woman, which is how I identify because Pro-Choice has become synonymous with Pro-Abortion), and are someone who actively demonstrates against abortion, who supports politicians who vote against my right to choose and who believes that every pregnancy should end in a baby regardless of the wishes and/or physical and mental well-being of the woman carrying that baby, please defriend me now, as I don't want to be anywhere near you, even virtually. 

Reproductive rights must be absolute and the rights of the born must outweigh the rights of the unborn, 100% of the time.  Otherwise, women are nothing more than broodmares.

Neigh.
I didn't think it was possible for me to respect Sarah Palin less.  I was wrong

Palin defends use of "blood libel" phrase.

“Blood libel obviously means being falsely accused of having blood on your hands and in this case,” Ms. Palin said, “that’s exactly what was going on.”

Are you fucking kidding me?  Seriously?  On SNL last Saturday, Seth Myers said that he'd be incredibly offended if he thought Mrs. Palin actually knew what it meant.  Well, now it's time to be offended. 

Stupid, anti-Semitic, douchebag, asshat, jackass, asshole, look-in-her-eyes-and-see-the-back-of-her-skull, half-Governor, thank FSM she's not Vice President so she's nowhere near The Button, nasty, hope she loses her figurative voice forever, lousy excuse for a human being.  

If I left any out, please let me know.  

Oh, and in case you're wondering, I'm not letting this one go. 

Ever.

And here's Jon Stewart to play us out...


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